Money in many households is a hot-button issue when it comes to children. When do you approach the subject and how? Speaking as a mother myself, this question has come up for me. I’ll take a few moments to give you my insights on the subject.
As money is so ingrained in every aspect of our daily lives, our children get an unconscious picture of what money is by observation. How we deal with money will invariably rub off on them. So first take a close look at how you handle it. If you are constantly saying “We don’t have enough money,” then that message of scarcity will permeate their understanding of what money is. Take a look at how your parents handled money and you might start to see a pattern. So change the way you see and interact with money to be the best role model you can to give your children a healthy relationship with it.
So first and foremost – calm down! Don’t let emotions enter your reactions about money. Children may not understand the words you’re saying, but they will understand the emotions behind them clear as day. Children under 4 are still forming the basis of their understanding of the world, and heated emotional outbursts about money will sink into that world view. So calm down and do not allow yourself to become emotional about money. Stressing over money, the lack of money, the management of money, etc. is not productive for you or for them. Talks about money with your significant other should be calm, supportive, non-confrontational and use logical problem solving.
When your children are old enough to request things from the store, then it’s time to begin the hands-on teaching techniques. This is the best time to teach math skills and delayed gratification. In the beginning, children may not have the focused attention needed, but if you keep at it, they will get better at understanding the concept of delayed gratification. Start a piggy bank and have them put a picture of what they are saving for beside it. Welcome them to change the picture should they change their minds. Take out all the money and count it with the child every other week and keep a number on a tally board. The visual stimulation of seeing the number rise at every count builds confidence.
Teach the attitude of gratitude. Whenever your youngster receives money, have them thank the person that gave it. Teaching appreciation at an early age may fend off the “spoiled child” route. Simple messages such as “please,” “thank you,” and “you’re welcome” are wonderful for building well-adjusted youths.
Let us hear your thoughts below: